The Bone I Have To Pick With Social Media

This morning I read an article about an Icelandic woman who didn’t like the way she looked in the selfies she posted to Facebook, which kickstarted her 100+ pound weight loss. Now, don’t get me wrong…this is an awesome thing. It’s an amazing, fantastic, inspirational thing. In fact, I’ve even talked about how great selfies are for your health before.

But this article got me thinking…even though this woman’s journey was one of self-discovery and self-confidence, it gets at a very problematic issue I have with social media as a whole.

Social media has become the way that many of us seek validation.

I joked with someone the other day that we find solace in our friendships by how many people post on our Facebook walls on our birthdays. I may have been teasing, but how many of us have checked the number of people who write each year? I’d guess quite a few more than are willing to admit it.

How many of us post a picture on Instagram just chopping at the bit to see how many likes we get? Or how many of us post a funny tweet and hold our breaths to see how many ReTweets we got?

Hell, I’ve done it. I’ll fully admit to that.

Not only are we not present and lose social skills, but so many of us are using social media to validate how attractive, worldly, intelligent, or just plain awesome we are. Sure, some likes and some comments may give you a boost of confidence…and that’s fantastic…but what about the negative side? How about the social media shaming and cyber bullying that happens each and every day? Many of those people on the bullied end of cyber bullying are doing nothing more than validating themselves through their posts; the only way they know how.

So if you truly don’t care what people think, keep on posting. But if you’re the type that has one or two insecurities (and news flash: that’s everyone), think twice next time before posting if it’s simply to validate yourself. We should only be seeking validation in one spot: within ourselves.